How to grow your leadership skills

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10 ways to improve your body language

You are continually sending out signals to other persons through your body called nonverbal. The word nonverbal or Nonverbal communication (NVC) is the nonlinguistic transmission of information through visual, auditory, tactile, and kinesthetic (physical) channels.

In an average 30 min interaction with others, you will send out over 800 nonverbal. This nonverbal communication is 12-13 times stronger than the things that you are saying.

If you learn how to decode this new language, you will have an advantage edge in life. It´s a matter of the fact that you already know this language, but you perhaps are not aware of it.

If you want to learn more about body language, take a look at my courses in leadership here.

1. Learn from the best- Rule number one is that you can learn a few tips, but if you want to master this skill, you need to learn from the best. It is like the saying, “Give your child a fish and you will feed him for a day, teach him how to fish, and you will feed him for a lifetime. Find people that are considered to be experts in this area and learn from them. Some of the experts that I have learned from are
Vanessa Van Edwards, Joe Navarro, and Patti Wood.

2. Tilt your head- When you tilt your head, you will come across as very friendly and open to listening to others. If you need to correct someone or if you have bad news, the message will not be as harsh if you tilt your head.

3. Show your open hands- If you are standing in front of an audience, you should always show your palms, so-called free hands. The first thing another person is looking for in your hands. The reason for that is that it comes from the time when we were hunters and carried weapons. If you hide, your hands' people will perceive you as not sincere or that you are withholding some information.

4. Move your hands and your body- Your body should complement the things that you are saying. For instance, if you are describing something in words, you could visualize that with your hands as well. Try to keep your hand in a box in front of you. If your gestures become too vivid, you might come across as not sincere or that you are overdoing it.

5. Make a point by steepling- When you put your fingertips together, it indicates authority and that your thing. It might be appropriated to finish your statement with this power pose. You can give another person authority while they are speaking if you do the steepling during their presentation. Be careful though, because you can easily overdo it and then your influence is gone.

6. Use your eye gaze in a better way- Depending on where your eyes are looking while you are talking to another person you will have good or bad influence with them. First of all, you need to look at them in the eyes and only brake eye contact when you feel that it´s necessary for you or the other person to think. If you want to listen to and make your point clearer, you should use the Power gaze. The different gazes can be found here. Women must be aware of the intimate gaze because if they wear a neckless, men´s gaze might be drawn down from the eyes, and they can experience less attention.

7. Look at the feet- The body parts that are furthest away from your heart are the ones that often tell the truth. For example, if you are talking to someone and the feet at the other person are pointing away from you, you know that that person wants to get away from you. You can also look at other people’s feet in a room, and if they are pointing at you, they might be interested in you.

8. Talk with a lower tone of voice- People with a more moderate tone of voice tend to be taken more seriously than people with a higher tone of voice. Also, when you do a presentation, think about your pace. Talk slower than you´re used to, and people will listen. It takes a bit of practice. A pause at the right place in a speech will do wonders.

9. Be aware of your pacifiers- When we are under pressure or stress, we tend to commit to pacifying behaviors. Even though you are under stress, you don´t need to show that because others might take advantage of the situation. A pacifying response can be rubbing your neck, touching your face, fidgeting or tapping with your feet or similar things.

10. Take up more space- An alfa gorilla male makes himself bigger by hitting his chest with his hands and throughs things around to claim space. I am not suggesting you should do that but you can just by being more confident have a more open posture, avoiding crossing your legs or arms. By putting one hand on a desk, you will be claiming more space. The leader sits in the middle of the table and takes up space.

Studies show that your cortisol level (stress hormones) will decrease when people were holding the arms above their heads in a V-shape for a couple of minutes. It´s why it is so essential to work with your posture when you are walking. Chest out, and shoulders down will make you feel more confident. The other way around is also valid.

 

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